Blagmatic lies and excuses

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Lee Foster, Jun 5, 2003.

Users Viewing Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 0)

  1. Lee Foster

    Lee Foster Dark Magician of Chaos

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2002
    Messages:
    1,408
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    The Shadow Realm
    Blagmatic lies and excuses

    What’s the most inventive lie that you have used to avoid doing something, or to ease yourself from a sticky situation?

    Change the names to Mr X and Miss Y to avoid recriminations.

    Let’s see how cunning the board members really are!
  2. 1615634792921.png
  3. eyeball

    eyeball Registered User

    Joined:
    Nov 28, 2001
    Messages:
    8,704
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Shoreditch, East London
    well, this isnt me, but someone that i know, albeit dont like much
    whenever he wants a day off work, he tells his boss some pretty stupid lies, like:

    his dad has had a heart attack
    his gran has died

    and so on, he uses excuses like this all the time, more fool his boss for being so fucking stupid and believing him!:eek: :
  4. Amyblah

    Amyblah Registered User

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2001
    Messages:
    5,473
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Consett
    I told my boss my Grandma died to get a day off for a job interview. I dont even have a grandma! My mam advised me to do it cos my boss was a twat and wouldnt let me have time off for interviews so I had no choice but to make it up. I think my mam even rang me at work to tell me the bad news!
  5. ManofScience

    ManofScience Guest

    a lad i knew at uni pretended to be Dyslexic so he could get a free computer off the goverment. i didn't have the balls to give it a go.
  6. Damocles

    Damocles Registered User

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2002
    Messages:
    7,549
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    London
    I once invited Miss X back to my house after we had been out at the shack for lisa lashes last year but when we got back it started to seem less and less of a good idea and rather a dreadful mistake. So in a moment of pure genius i rang my house phone off my mobile and pretended it was my work ringing and i had to go there straight away.

    But don't worry i wasn't a complete cunt i rang a taxi for her and paid for it. Tis probs the best lie i've ever told.
  7. Jimmy

    Jimmy Registered User

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2002
    Messages:
    24,724
    Likes Received:
    47
    Location:
    Bedlington
    I have also done that a couple of times:)
  8. SeniorChem Si

    SeniorChem Si Registered User

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2002
    Messages:
    7,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Getting it on
    I went on a date once with a lass I'd been talking to off the web, should have been suspicious when the only photo she had was a tiny crappy web cam photo and she did tell me that she wasn't stunning good looking or anything, but she did seem really canny and I was quite looking forward to it.

    Anyway, plan was I'd go round hers, have a couple beers before we went out. I got there and realised I'd made a terrible mistake, this lass was a complete munter, there was no way on god's earth this side of about 40 pints I was gonna touch her, and make matters worse she obviously fairly fancied me.

    After about 45 minutes agonising what should I do, be a cunt and blow her out or do the decent thing and go through with the date I decided I had to get out of it somehow.... I was worried I'd get pissed and end up fucking her.

    She was upstairs putting her face on and I very quietly phoned LoopyLoosy and told her to phone me straight back and pretend that she was out with my mate, her boyfriend, and that he'd been in a fight and was in hospital. Lucy was a total star, phoned back 2 mins later and I was putting on this massive act shouting "Lucy man, Lucy, calm down tell me what's happened! Oh my god, scotty what, he's in hospital, what how come, oh fuckin hell is he ok? how much blood??? ok Lucy just calm down, I'll be there as quick as I can"

    I then ran upstairs, told this lass the bullshit story, which she'd heard from my screaming and shouting, apologised profusely, promised I'd phone her (more lies) and legged it out the house and straight to shindig for the ressies party where I met up with Lucy and proceeded to have a mint night out :D


    Scary thing is, me mate who I'd pretended was in hospital, was actually out that night with other mates, one of whom phoned at about 3am saying that he'd been in a fight and was in hospital, I swear that is 100% true *gulp*
  9. spud693

    spud693 Registered User

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2002
    Messages:
    6,471
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out in the sticks cool as fukk gang! :)
    Bad karma init ;)

    but good lying :p if i find myself in that situation i will remember that :p

    :D :groovy: :D
  10. crasher_chick

    crasher_chick I .....

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2003
    Messages:
    4,303
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Liverpool, with Geordie roots!!
    Hee hee white lies eh!
    A think every 1s tryed the 'my grandmas dying/died sob sob' one before like, works every time tho, dont it! lol xx:p
  11. spud693

    spud693 Registered User

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2002
    Messages:
    6,471
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out in the sticks cool as fukk gang! :)
    i was off for 5 weeks doin that. killed off a canny bit of my family it did :p

    2 actually did die:( , (well, one and my dog, but that counts :oops: ) but i killed off about three and made it out to be a right nightmare...

    so i had an excuse for bein off, but i majorly overexagerated it.... i done it well, tho im not proud of it :oops:
  12. Angiebaby

    Angiebaby

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2003
    Messages:
    278
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    wherever i fall
    i actually did have my gran and my uncle die within 4 days of each other, and the only time off my work would give me was to go to their funerals, and i worked in a fucking doctors uncompasionate wankers!

    I bought some alloys wheels for my car which cost me £1000 and had to get a loan to pay for them, but coz my parents would of totallu killed me i told them i bought them off a mate for £150, parents are so gulible
  13. Sleepy

    Sleepy Registered User

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2002
    Messages:
    16,747
    Likes Received:
    0
    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Si mate, THATS FUKKIN CLASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Lol - can imagine loos wud be perfect person to help out with that too - classic!!!

    :groovy:

Share This Page